laurelpants

I have to say, we had a great family game night. Despite Gus' volume, and Tim's annoyance with us all that he made quite clear, just having my mom around was nice. Plus, neither Luanne or Marni played.
Today in lunch, Carina told me that I looked a lot happier with my mom here. Whuddasuprize... She got her phone away, Murphy called her dumb. "Hey, Laurel, you have a DUMB friend!" I just looked at him, and held my tongue. Yesterday Rachel was on the bus. Murphy at first didn't see her, sat with me, and then saw her: the seat behind us, and asked me if it was all right if he sat with her. That made me feel really awkward.. I should have said no though, because that would have been funny. Shucks. I keep seeing Dan in the hallway. I left Deadline in English, and when I went back to get it at the end of the day, Mrs. Blessman had already left. I changed my formative, I'm going to paint Rudy McCoy: the town drunk, ex-priest, and child molester. I have such a great idea for it. I love my mommma, bringin' back my creativity and all that snazzy stuff.

The Grudge 2 is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo stupid. Soooooooooooooooooooooooooo annoying, am I.
In journalism, I have a cut out of "I Think Therefore I Am" and I'm using it in my project; Lisa. All of the projects were switched to being due on Monday. I love how I didn't even do them, and now have an extra week, basically, to do them. AHa!~

Now I'm going downstairs to watch The Grudge 3, get scared out of my mind, and sleep with my momma in the creepy basement.

I'm learning how to play Steal Me, by Jupiter Sunrise, on the g00t4R. Uh. Uh. Uh. Y34H.

AND ALSO, I saw a man at Shop n Save who looked just like Brian Chase. I followed him around, just in case he had a son. Just kidding ;)


BUGBUGBUG

Does that mean you're bi?"

I got Courtland's letter. And a manilla envelope for Laura and the memoir.

My life, oh man.

I saw a lot of Dan today. I feel really smug about him saying Hi to me every time we see each other, and him not doing that with Carina. He was at our lunch today, we acknowledged each other with smiles. He sat like right in front of Carina and myself. He also has a new guitar, that says Papa Roach on it; what a faggot. My mom is bringing up my guitar on Sunday. I was trying to tell Carina how great it smells, and that I'll be sleeping with the case open so my room can smell just like it too, but she wasn't paying attention. I should have sat with Dan and Derek. I like them much more. Next time Dan says something to me, I need to work up the courage to ask him if he wants to hang out. But I guess first I should start saying Hi too.
On the bus, Murphy went through my iTouch and I was thinking about whether or not I should ask him what he was going to be doing this weekend. I didn't. Guess what Murphy was doing tonight? Murphy picked up Kevin, but really Ryan Marshall was driving. Carina saw them, started hollering, and they backed up. They all thought she was high; no guys, she's just really fucking obnoxious. They drove off without us. Carina was telling me what Kevin told her on the bus. They're all getting high, and are going to eat a chicken while watching Pineapple Express. I feel like if Carina wasn't with me and I was walking, I would have been invited. That or I wouldn't have even seen them, and wouldn't be so down in the dumps. I then bought crab rangoon from First Wok. There's some high school kid that works there, I'm pretty sure. I wish he would have taken my order. I liked that he smiled at me, even if it is part of the job criteria. The old Asian lady didn't smile at me. Carina was supposed to walk with me home, but when I was at Shop n Save she went home, so I walked home by myself. Hallelujah, thank you Jesus!

Me and my mom fought on the phone. That's so ridiculously absurd. It was about hobbies too. She got mad because I told her if I wanted to be a photographer, I'd have to get a new camera. Which is pretty true, but not entirely. I just want a better one.

I think I deserve a boyfriend too.

Of course!

I'm breaking out all ova ;(

Luanne's 'tude is just really ticking me off. She's so rude.
Dinner tonight smelled really weird. That reminds me that I didn't finish the dishes. Swell!!

Laura has her phone back, she called me twice. I'm not going to call you back Laura, because you're with someone or multiple people.

I hate smoking when it's cold outside.

"Humans originally consisted of four arms, four legs, and a single head made of two faces, but Zeus feared their power and split them all in half, condemning them to spend their lives searching for the other half to complete them." I like her a lot.

Michelle's house is fun.

today was so weird.
I missed my bus at my stop because I was having some EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA and so I walked to the stop in Saddlebrook. It was 45 degrees this morning.
Murphy sat with me for about three minutes this morning, talked about my book, gave me my cigarettes, and just talked more about my book. Jerel, his girlfran Paige, and this kid Dan all came up and Dan got Murphy and I felt really weird about that going down. Like it was planned. It felt planned.
Sub for world history.
Sub for journalism.
Mrs. Salant talked about when she was almost a juror for a murder case.
We're writing a childrens' book in English about the Book of Fred. Michelle's my partner, our book is titled 'Fred for Kids!' and I'm going to her house tomorrow to work on it. I'm so excited.
In art I didn't finish the project like I was supposed to. I'm putting a super secret message in mine. There's an arrow that says Go in it, and it's going to be pointing to Florida. All geometric shapes. I feel so cool.
Lunch was cold. Near the end Murphy and some kid were fighting but not really and it was so funny. I WISH WE WERE BETTER FRIENDS AHHHHA.
We finished our notes in Chemistry. Part one of the test is tomorrow. Three questions worth 100 points, ooohhhh.
Geometry was all right, I guess. I had the feeling that kids were talking about me though.

There was a car crash on 94, and Murphy and I just talked and talked and talked. The thing is, I don't mind not talkin', but once I get goin', I hate to stop. I had so much more to say when Murphy had to get off the bus. I have KOOL cigarettes now too. Two packs. I almost got caught smoking today. Luanne was supposed to be gone, but apparently she didn't pick up today. If I wasn't in the unusual spot I was, crouching down because I was sleepy, she would have seen me take at least one drag. I got inside and saw the door open and nearly shit bricks. I was terrified. Then I fell asleep in the shower as it padded against my back. That's the wrong verb, I can't think of the right one.

Game night. I won Imagine Iff... I rock.
I didn't watch The OC today because a line was, "Why? Because the boy I lost my virginity to had sex with my mom?" Stupid, Luanne.

I KNOW ABOUT SEX!!!

GAME NIGHT NOW.

Really, really.

I talked to my mom for a long time last night. And today on the bus ride home, I realized she's coming up this Sunday. I'm going to see my mom this Sunday. Janet's picking us up, and we're going to get her at the bus station, and we're going to Sewlard which is downtown St. Louis, and I'm so excited. Oh my God I'm so excited.

Today went by so slow, oh my God. I hate this cold rainy weather. Sunday better be marvelous. If Sunday isn't marvelous, it'll make me sad.
I was laughing like a lunatic in the morning today, and I don't know why. Everything was just really funny.
Dylan Kennedy, Joe Kiss-Cabbage, and Ryan Something-Or-Other took the shavings of trash and scattered them in the stairwell. Morons.
Mrs. Dunaway bragged about all of the awards her students and daughter were given while in DC.
We're watching Runaway Jury in novel. I love Mrs. Salant. Thank you, Mrs. Salant.
Mrs. Blessman wasn't in class today. Thank you, Mrs. Blessman. We read and did an extremely trivial exercise and it was really boring. I wish Marni wouldn't cry every night. Every night. "I want mommy," she has no idea.
Mrs. Kendall wasn't in class either. Our sub was really young, like a freshman in college or something. I didn't talk all hour. I didn't want to talk at all today. I was in a mood.
Murphy was apparently searched today, or so Carina says. He gave her his cigarettes and told her to give me one, which I thought was nice, but really weird. I have my own pack...
Chemistry is so much fun. I love the diagrams. Lewis Structures and VSEPR are easy as pie. I love it! I still haven't taken the polynomial quiz or the trial two interview, heh.
Geometry was real easy too.
The bus ride was all right, I guess. Like I said, that's when I remembered my mom visiting for a week. I really wish Carina wasn't going to be with us for Thanksgiving, she's going to want me to pay attention to her. And Luanne will comment about my neglecting of Carina. Stupid bitch.

My mom talked to Luanne about my birth control because I just couldn't do it. When I was sick we didn't even go to the doctor's, why would we go just because I need some pills? I'm a virgin, I don't really know any boys, I sure as hell can't flirt. She started bitching about money. We're so poor right now, but really we've always been really poor. That's how it goes when you're a single mother with very, very little support. And the support isn't for my mom, it's for me and my brother. I need the support of my mother, not my aunts and uncles. My mom needs the support of everyone. Why can't anyone see that? I want to go home. I want to go home because Luanne doesn't want us here; and she's made that very clear, to me at least.

6:26/ 7:26 your time, at home on Saturday. Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

I sincerely hate the fact that every time Dan leaves in his car, you can hear him. He must run errands for his mom because he seriously leaves like every five minutes. It's so sad that I know that. I wish Murphy's phone wasn't broken. I wish I could hangout with him everyday. I'd be so happy. I also wish Michelle did things other than clean and do school work, but that's something to look up to I guess. I'd love it if I liked to clean and study. Her life is full of positive possibilities.

Today, my mom saw West Side Story at the Lyric Theatre. I love that play. I love downtown Stuart. I love Florida. Biggs played Officer Krupke, ahhhaha. I want to go to a play. That's what I'll look into, yyyyyeah. It has to be cheap enough for someone else to go with me though. And I'd rather go with Michelle. I want to hangout with her a lot more. Why do I keep going back to Carina? I don't fucking know, Goddamnit.

I really want to see The Fourth Kind, so someone go see it and then tell me if its worth it or not. I don't want to be scared shitless for no good reason, but I guess if I'm scared shitless it was for good reason. Yeah. I just really want to hangout with Murphy. Oh my God I want to hang out with him. Why can't I just ask him what he's doing over the weekend? Because I already know. He's getting high with that kid Nathan and going to parties or just having a grand 'ol time with people in their 20's. I don't like feeling so much younger than everyone. I know who I want to be friends with, but I just can't bring myself to talk to them. Not like they're in my classes anyway, other than the entirety of my novel class. Michelle's friends with the new Asian kid in my homeroom. I'm going to ask her how she makes friends so easily. She's fearless, Goddamn.

Why can't I have a boyfriend, guys? Why can't I get over Michael? Why can't I flirt with anyone? Why do I feel more comfortable with a person one on one, rather than in a group? How can I get everyone I want to hangout with in that kind of situation? What's the cure for cancer?

I was pretty upset about Jessie dating this Will kid I don't even know, and therefore do not like, trust, or plan to like and trust. Outcast #2, as I so told them. I hate how everything and everyone is changing but me. All I do is get sadder. The book I'm reading now, The Burn Journals, referenced George Winston, and I used to listen to him with my mom. Brent, the main character in the book, describes himself and his thoughts in exactly how I would, even in the style that it's written. It's a nonfiction book. I feel so bad for him, because I'm sorry for myself. It's not that I don't want Jessie to be dating someone, or Laura to be seeing Mike, or anyone to be with anyone. I just want to be apart of it, and I can't very well do that living 17 hours away. I know that. So I was thinking all that over, and how much I miss everyone and everything, and how much I'd give to live in Florida again and just be part of that misery, with people I know and love rather than in Missouri with a family of strangers and feeling so sad all of the time. I'm such a downer, all of the time. I hate being so grumpy and miserable. I really like art though, Tyler's so great. But why, why does he have to smoke pot all of the time? Why can't I meet someone here that I want to be friends with that doesn't do drugs, but doesn't mind cigarettes and buying them for me. Murphy, you've really let me down, man. So has TJ, and Jerel. Kevin, oh man, Kevin's the best. When I was going back to geometry, he was walking pretty fast to his last hour and was late, and he turned to me and quoted: "I'm late, I'm late, to a very important date!" while kind of dancing with his hands. Kevin. I want to hangout with Kevin. I want to hangout with everyone. I just want to hangout.

I fell asleep to George Winston, and I didn't find the song that me and my mom used to listen to. Reading The Burn Journals really makes me sad. It has so much to do with who I am, and what's going on. I just want to remember what song it is so that I can listen to it and cry because of how much I miss my mom, and that yellow room, and how things used to seem so easy for us all. I walk around school, and people never approach me because I look sad and mean, because I am. And it's all my fault. I can't even remember how I became so insecure and sad and mean. I think it's all Darrien Mason's fault. Her and her huge tits, and freckles, and her ways. I take it all back. I regret everything, everyday. I make all of the wrong choices. I'm such a moron.

Today all I could think about was the George Winston song. Some of the songs I have downloaded are real close to it, like how he's playing and all, but it's just not right. It's killing me. I don't want to ask my mom though, because it'll make me cry. I don't like calling her crying, because I want to be as strong as my mom. She's such a beautiful person, with such a beautiful personality. I love my mom more than anything, and I wish I could tell her how proud I am of her. We've been through what seems so much together, and I just can't bear having to deal with this without her. My mom is my life. I feel like I'm dying. I just don't feel like myself, and I don't know how to act. I just act boring, as everyone's told me. I don't want to have any fun. Having fun is too hard to explain, and so explaining it to everyone that matters is too hard to do. "I had fun because I hung out with these kids and you have no idea how much it meant to me." What? I wish I had someone to hug, for as long as I needed, that wouldn't really talk to me, and hugged me back just as tightly. I feel like I don't touch people enough. What's the commercial, the Touch and be Touched commercial? They know what's going on. I feel so alone and out there, and people look at me like I'm crazy because of how I wear my hair and dress. I miss feeling welcomed. I don't feel welcomed. I don't really feel outcasted either, just different. And it's more like I know I'm different, and I don't want to bother anyone. I don't want to become a bother. I feel like I've become a bother to Murphy. I wish we were actual friends. I need friends. I don't even have friends. Carina isn't my friend. Carina can't possibly imagine what being a friend to me even entails. Michelle isn't my friend because we can never see each other if we aren't at school. It's too late for everyone else in my classes, I've wasted precious time.

I just want to go to bed.

I wish I lived in Florida so bad. Moving here has been the worst choice in my life. I can't believe I did this to myself, willingly, as if it'd make a change for the better. They're crazy. I'm crazy. I hate it.

I really, really, really miss Michael Picone. I wish I saw him before I left, rather than allowing myself to give up on him. I want him to come to Fort Lauderdale with us, but it'd be really awkward. I'm just so afraid I'm not going to see him. I know it sounds corny, but we were supposed to be friends forever, and I just really want for that to be true. I love Michael, he's the greatest. We have the longest history, and that's just so sad. Eighth grade was the fucking best, even though it really was shit.

Murphy wasn't at school today. I still haven't done trial two for chemistry, nor have I really started the novel project due tomorrow; I just finished Velocity. Mrs. Blessman is a bitch. Today was Michelle's birthday. I want to go home so badly. Thanksgiving is less than two weeks away? I want it to be Thanksgiving. Carina's spending Thanksgiving with us because Marcia hates her. Marcia's threatening Carina's mom now. Marcia is such a lowlife. So is Carina. I wish I had friends. I wish I had a boyfriend, but not a boy from up here, and not a boy in Florida. Nothing fits with me. I hate Florida, I hate Missouri, I love Florida. I think when I get back to Florida, I'm never moving away from my mom. That scares me. I'm drifting.

gave me a cigarette on the bus because he felt bad about not having my cigarettes, and so I told him I loved him.

Today kids who were trying out for hockey had fucking crazy hair cuts. I guess the team players from years previous buzzed their heads. They had to leave it how they had cut it, or the team would shave off their eyebrows. Oh man. This kid in my geometry class had long hair, and today he had two pigtails of hair coming out from the side of his newly shaved head; the kid who did it to him shaved his jersey number into his head too. Oh man.
Today, a former assistant principle subbed for our art class, and he worked for NASA. He doesn't think it's awesome, because it was just a job. I wanted to shank him for saying that, holy fuck. He was really fat.

I'm very far behind in my schoolwork.

oh my God, I just realized it. I don't want to do it at all. I can't find anything on my semester project for chemistry, and I can't bullshit it this time. I got by so easy for trial one, holy moly. Velocity is also supposed to be finished, but I'm only halfway. The book scares me :(

Murphy still hasn't called me back.
Carina had a sex dream about me and Jerel. He was a vampire, and she let him kill me. I felt really weird, hearing her tell me about her dream of me and Jerel. Why would she dream about me fucking Jerel on her couch? I don't even want to fuck Jerel on her couch. No way, no how.

I rrrrrrrreeeeeaallllllllyyy need 35mm film. I bought a camera from Goodwill for $30, and am now realizing what a ripoff it was. Ha, Goodwill ripped me off. I spent $73 there, holy shit. I like it all though, I like it allllllll. I want to carry the camera all over with me, it's so beautiful. I'd fuck it on Carina's couch.
I went over there last night. We watched some of Funny Games. She freaked out about it, and I had to turn it off when Marcia and the kids, and Margie, got home. That put me in a sour mood. We walked to Shop n Save and I bought Yoohoo's (which are now bigger and come in a four-pack), butterscotch chips, and marshmallows. She bought Funyuns, pizza bites, and a six-pack of Coca Cola. We like a lot of the same food, and I think that's why I like her. We're different in every way imaginable, except for our taste in foods. Crazy!
I left her house around one o'clock because we weren't doing anything.

I HAVEN'T SEEN ANYONE ON O'FALLON IN A LONG TIME, AND I'D LOVE DEARLY FOR THAT TO CHANGE.

having $77, and knowing that I'll be getting another $10 tomorrow because they didn't pay us last week.

This morning when I was hockin up a loogie in the kitchen, I spat it out in a paper towel and part of it was a dark purple color. My sinuses are ..disturbed, I guess. It was blood. YUM!

I babysat last night. Gus is evil, and just legitimately scares the shit out of me. He will be the perfect serial killer, except he's not friendly in a creepy way; he's just straight up creepy. He also won't listen to me, so it makes me want to punish him further, which can't be done because he won't listen to the authority that is me. Marni was an angel, oh God I love her so much more sometimes. She's creepy too though, don't get me wrong.

Carina came over around 6:00 and left around 7:00... She called me and told me she had to go to her house for her medication. She's now medicated to take pills that will help her deal with her bipolar disorder, and sumthin else that I forgot. When she got back, she told me that she bumped into Rachel as she was walking home and had five hits of da doobie. "Yeah, but I only had five...," "Okay," "Yeah so uh..," "You're NOT high," "I know," "Are you sure you know?" "Yeah!" "All right..," She kept talking about it. I was pretty mad, and I plan on telling Murphy and then he'll feel bad for me and invite me to smoke with him and his friends. YEAHHHHHH BOYYYYY. I still don't have my cigarettes. I've given up calling someone that never answers their phone.
Withheld called me at least another five times last night, and it really freaked me out. Velocity, the book I'm reading, is a murder mystery and the freak that's killing innocent people calls Billy Wiles and just doesn't talk. But of course, I haven't received any notes saying I need to chose who to kill so I'd say I'm pretty safe. But just.. my paranoia makes it very difficult for me to think logically like this when it's real nice and dark outside, and I'm watching everyone. Super duper party pooper.
When Tim and Luanne got home, it wasn't yet one o'clock, and I was so relieved. Luanne wasn't shitfaced, and I don't think she was so drunk that she doesn't remember anything from last night. Carina went in and talked to her and told her Harry hit her in the lip with one of her guitars for GuitarHero -Lie. I'm going to have to talk to Luanne about that now, because her judgments of Harry are bad enough already. OH GOD, HE TOLD ME YESTERDAY HE'S DYING HIS HAIR DARK BROWN. Ridiculous, if you ask me.
And so after Tim and Luanne's arrival we went to bed. Carina is so hard to sleep with, and I can't really say that without feeling weird because people call me a lesbian. And even if I was a lesbian, I would never ever, ever, put any moves on Carina Chapel "Markley", ever. I didn't really have a lot of room to sleep, on my own bed, and I had to sleep with the window open because Carina forgot her pajamas, and so that made my nose real nice and crusty.

This morning, her arm fell on my tit, which woke me up. And I tried to go back to bed because it was so early, but then she did something weird to the covers she took away from me. She wadded them in between us, and I almost fell off the bed. I woke up, made some eggs, downloaded some music that wasn't the Alvin Band, and then had to turn my iTunes real low because Luanne was goin' back to bed.

I also now need permission to watch certain movies. Why are ALL of the movies I'm interested in rated R? Because they're good, and matured, and I'm good and matured. I don't watch R rated films for sex scenes and just nudity in general. If it's rated R, it has more of a plot and is USUALLY a better movie. I'm canceling the Netflix for here if I can't watch what I want to. Fuck you.

thinks I'm a lesbian. Oh my God. Carina told me all about her conversation with Jerel on the bus, and it was about me being a hot ass lesbian. I'm so str8 its scary, but not really at all.
He also asked me if I was doing anything interesting this morning, and I was short with him because I'm sick. I'm only going to hang out with him if he gives me weed.


I want my cigarettttesssss. And to go to the doctor, and to get more birth control.
I came home around 10 today.
I didn't recognize Molly.
The nurses are really nice.










BEHhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh

I don't like celebrating because I'm not doing it with the people I want to. I wish I could have been in Palm City, instead of Monticello Estates. I told Luanne I had a really nice time though. For most of the night Carina and I were in the bug. I love that car. The seats heat up. My ass was on fire, and it felt so good. It was at 44 when we walked back to Carina's from my favorite house in the neighborhood. She called Jerel like six times, and it was really stupid. Her dad gave her a beer and she shared it with me. They wanted to go to the store to get some wine, and if either of us had our wallets on us we could have gotten Smirnoff Ice fuckourlives. I couldn't go to sleep at Carina's because she's fat and takes up all of the bed, and I was getting sick. I had Tim pick me up before 8, I guess, and I slept all day yesterday. I also took two baths and a shower. I feel like my fever has gone down, and that I'm a lot better, but my ear still really hurts. They thought I had the flu. I'm going to the doctor today.



Harry was beat up by some little kid with a christmas tree. The cut is really gross.

fucking take not being able to do something new and exciting for Halloween. I can't believe it. Today, Carina and Kevin failed to show up at school. So we're not hanging out with Kevin. I guess Murphy doesn't have Kevin's number, and I know he doesn't know where he lives, because he couldn't help me out in my dilemma. He probably doesn't see it as a dilemma, but having to hang out with Carina all of the time really fucking sucks. I feel bad for her though, because Marcia's selfish and her dad has no idea what's going on. Murphy again didn't invite me to join him on his Halloween escapade, but did say he'd be getting high with Nathan. Surprise. He's going to make a pipe out of his toy gun, because he likes to be creative. He was dressed as a cowboy today.
In novel, kids were dressed up and Rachel was wearing the boots that I oh so desire. We talked about her boots, and she told me I could get them at Target. I thought that was weird, because she has them, but then again I thought that it really wasn't a big deal and hated myself for thinking that it was. But seriously, they're PERFECT. The boots at Urban Outfitters are $78 and have heel, but the ones from Target don't. H0lL4~
I liked being dressed as Nancy Drew, because I fucking loved the outfit even though the shoes gave me blisters. I met two new girls today, because of Michelle. Molly and Alexis. I like Molly more than Alexis because Alexis looks conservative. Molly likes my way of dress, or today's way of dress. She also didn't seem grossed out at the thought of buying shit from Goodwill. I hope talking to her wasn't a one time only kind of thing.
In art, Derek was staring a hole into my soul. Whenever he answered a question, I'd look at him, and he was staring at me rather intensely and it made me really uncomfortable. I hated darting my eyes away from his, because that's a sign of insecurity and that's something I despise to admit. When I was cutting the excess string from my calligraphy project, kids were talking about me at Table One, and when I was going back to my table, they all stared at me. I fixed my hat.

Camel Menthol Crushes. Monday. No sooner, awesome. I should have reminded him that I haven't smoked in two fucking weeks.

am beautiful and flawless in my costume.

I went from being a pilgrim, to a unicorn, to Harry Potter, to Sherlock Holmes, and now I'm Nancy Drew. Nancy Drew because she's a girl, and I'm a girl, and so I can wear girly like clothes, clothes that I have.
I have to say, I'd wear this whenever in the year, and I plan on stealing the totally hip hat I'm wearing right now.
I wish I had super short hair. I think I'm going to cut my hair to the super short length I so desire. But I dunno, I keep fucking my hair up. It looks weird down now, so that's where this is all coming from.

I was giddy in school again. But then in novel I realized the day was going by reallllyyyy slow and just tried to sleep, but couldn't. The conversations seem so repetitive, it's getting on me nerves. I wish we could watch Love, Actually in novel, I love that movie.
During art we had to just draw something simple, in geometric shapes, and then again in organic shapes. I should have made a bet with Tyler that organic shapes was the one we had to do after geometric, because he said algebraic, and that's just dumb. I rubbed it in his face and felt five. Yesterday in art when I was hanging up my banner that I couldn't redo, Derek was also on the countertop and when he was getting down he said "Twinkies," I'M PRETTY SURE, over and over again. Then I felt a tap on my foot, and he was just standing by me, and I felt bad because I was like, "What the hell are you talking about?" "Our shoes!" "Oh..." "Just kidding..." "All right," Yeah.
But today I wanted to draw Captain K'nuckles, but I just couldn't do it. I also couldn't draw Flapjack or Bubby. I was so disappointed in myself. We had a long debate over what TV show Aaahh!!! Real Monsters. I just looked it up.

I loved that show. I'm going to tell all of them about it tomorrow, in my costume, I'm so excited.
I had four crab rangoon for lunch, and let Carina have the rest. The red powerade turned my teeth and lips red because my hygiene is the worst~~~~ Murphy told me that I couldn't get Blacks because he couldn't find them. Oh my God. They're banned, banned for good. The last Djarum Black I smoked was found on the ground, and Laura found it, and we almost didn't get it. I can't believe I'll never smoke another Djarum Black. I bet they aren't outlawed in Canada. I should go to College in New York, walk over the border for Blacks, and live like that. Commencing plan, oh yeah.
I really don't understand the ion formulas for chemistry. Da fuck is MgCl2 like, yeah, Magnesium Chloride, and there's two Chlorine elements. Yeah, but how do I KNOW THAT. Fuck. I'm gonna have to talk to Mrs. Clark in the morning, I hope Carina doesn't mind. PFhahaha, yeahhh.

Leaving school, I told Carina I would not be riding her bus because I didn't want to walk home in the rain. Because it was raining, Jerel was standing right in front of the doors I was to step out of, and he did the stupid gun thing to me again. He looked like a fag, with his washed out denim jacket, and grey pants and stupid shirt. But he was still attractive, and he always will be. That's why I dislike him so much. Because he's so handsome and he flirted with me, and nothing happened.
I wish I sat nearby Murphy, I don't even think he was on the bus. I walked home in the rain anyway because I felt like it.

Luanne's getting bitchier.